Chronic Alt-itis

Why 'ello 'ello 'ello, you pretty people, I hope I find the lot of you in good health and spirits today!  If not, cheer up and give me your widest, most mischievous grin 'cause it's a Saturday and there's not a reason in the world to be miserable, none whatsoever.  Hell, my hangover hasn't even kicked in yet!  Might be because I just stopped drinking, smoking, and carrying on like four hours ago.  Tired, but never too tired to give the internet a look-see.


Now look-see what I made!  It's Master Marauder, my Doctor Fate/Doctor Strange/Doctor blahblahblah character!  He's magical, he's mystical, he's COMING TO KICK YOU IN THE VAGINA.  Don't have a vagina?  HE DOESN'T CARE.  HE'LL JUST KICK YOU TILL ONE EVENTUALLY FORMS IN YOUR CROTCH AREA.  He's a crazy guy like that.  He practices medicine WITHOUT A LICENSE.  


FUCK YEAH.


But I digress, here, have a picture of him:

See those pants?  See those boots?  DAT CAPE?  This motherfucker doesn't motherfuck around, my friends.  He's got skulls all over his body, INCLUDING HIS FACE, and he will use them all the bludgeon you to an early grave with an unfulfilled life because he


DOESN'T


GIVE


A SHIT.






You see this shit?  He'll stand facing whichever direction he prefers, because that's just how the man operates, gnomesayin'?








More purple.  I have a thing for purple.  I bet it's the colour of a fully-fledged orgasm.  Just a full-on, balls-to-the-wall, blast-the-crotch-right-out-of-your-jeans-and-possibly-damage-your-belt purple raging orgasm.








Those boots just get sexier the more I look at them.  He's like the Sultan of Sultriness and Seduction.






You know, it's really not all that much of a surprise I get ads like THESE on my sidebar:


Keep it real, my nubile young 'netcrawlers.  And remember, if you're ever looking to meet older gay men, apparently I am in a position to hook you up, bitches.


Nap time nao.